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Friday, May 6, 2011

The Captain Jack Sparrow Handbook

I received an awesome new book in the mail the other day. It's called The Captain Jack Sparrow Handbook: A Swashbuckler's Guide from Pirates of the Caribbean by Jason Heller. I must say, this book is absolutely hilarious and a must have for any fan of Pirates of the Caribbean and especially Captain Jack. With a brand new Pirates movie soon to be released in theaters around the world, Pirate mania is at an all time high.

The book begins with this disclaimer:
Ahoy, All Ye Would-Be Pirates, Take Heed: This book is a work of entertainment. The publisher and author hereby disclaim any liability from an injury that may result from the use, proper or improper, of the information contained in this book. We do not guarantee that this information is safe, complete, or wholly accurate, nor should it be considered a substitute for a reader's good judgement and common sense.

Then the fun begins. This book provides insights into the pirate lifestyle, covering everything from the basics of How to Sail a Ship, to more complex issues such as How to Fight Six Angry Men in a Tavern! (In true Captain Jack fashion, the books recommends that you 1. Deflect the blame, 2. Get out of the way, and 3. Don't stick around!) This book features several full color pictures both from previous Pirates of the Caribbean films, as well as a few new photos from On Stranger Tides. There are six chapters full of piratical skills and an appendix of Piratical Lingo.

Chapter One: Piracy 101 - This chapter covers the basics of what a pirate should know about being a pirate, including a section on how to dress the part.

Chapter Two: Maritime Skills - Useful skills such as how to fire a cannon, the many types of Jolly Rogers, and the names for the parts of a ship

Chapter Three: People Skills - From the expected section on how to recruit a crew, to the unexpected on invoking parlay and a list of pirate insults and their meanings.

Chapter Four: Acquiring Booty - Topics include how to acquire treasure as well as how to hide it so that you may keep it.

Chapter Five: Cheating Death - My favorites from this chapter include How to Survive Being Marooned and The Fine Art of Being Somewhere Else!

Chapter Six: Mysteries of the Deep - This last chapter involves dealing with sea monsters, mermaids, curses and Davy Jones.

Appendix: Piratical Lingo - Learn the meaning of common pirate words as well as some that seem more exotic, such as salmagundi: "A makeshift British "recipe" popular among pirates: meat, seafood, vegetables, fruits, roots, nuts, leaves, flowers, oils, vinegars, sauces - just throw in what you've got."

In all, this is a fantastic book full of wonderful illustrations and great ideas for living the pirate lifestyle. Hopefully, with the help of the Captain Jack Sparrow Handbook, you can avoid Jack's mistakes and learn to be a highly successful pirate, perhaps, even the most famous pirate in the Caribbean!

I was provided with a copy of this book by Quirk Books for the purpose of review. All opinions are my own.

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